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Sunday, April 4, 2010

...aku cinta Allah...

andaikan diriku bisa seperti yang lain
yang Kau sayang
yang Kau rindukan
yang Kau cintai
aku lemah tanpaMu
aku lelah
aku sungguh tak berdaya
tolongku
tolongku Ya Allah
setiap air mataku mengalir
Allah, aku lemah dan tak berarti
setiap derai tangis membasahi
Allah, jangan tinggalkan aku lagi
aku sayang Allah
aku rindu Allah
aku cinta Allah
aku lemah tanpaMu
aku lelah
aku sungguh tak berdaya
tolongku
tolongku Ya Allah

i found this song while tending to my fragileness nearly 1.5 months ago...my soul was 'kosong'...i was soooo down...

it was so happen that my lovely girlfriends were none at the side...i cried a lot...i was demotivated...

how can i not fall for an angel sent by Him? a friend rephrase to me that we're the one who keeps forgetting Him, He never leaves any of us....sooooo true...

i trust that friend to talk about many, many life and after life queries...each time, i will feel calm...i found peace...thank you...

we're conscious now...i am relieved it is still fine and great...alhamdulillah...

recently we chatted on likeness...i try to deny something that i dislike...

and i keep reminding myself that something that i dislike maybe is likable by others - so, there must be something nice of everything regardless...

and there's also karma...if you dislike something/someone, it will reflect back to you that something/someone may not like you too in return...this part scares me...

according to my friend, it was normal as human being to not like certain people...people who annoys us at times...

asalkan jangan burukkan die...jangan fitnah2 orang...ngadu je aa ngan Allah...

ok...i will keep that to myself...between me and the people i don't like (not many...insyaAllah)...

i always perasan baik...maybe this menjengkelkan some people towards me...i choose to 'diam'...(again, perasan baiklah itu)

and we can't satisfy everyone...let them be...

and some can't satisfy me too...go ahead with your favourism...i won't judge you...my Ultimate Lover- Allah will...He knows...
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yesterday, Intan came to KL...we attended Ainan Safiyya's cukur jambul ceremony in Bandar Baru Salak Tinggi...happy to meet Puan Aini and Encik Azmi...we talked about 'bunian'...hehehe...apparently, Ainan has been disampuk/disergah by this 'city of unseen creatures'...it used to be a small community but now has become a powerful 'kerajaan'...the family had to call a scholar from Indonesia in aid of curing the situation...

i've heard of other stories too regarding this 'Misteri Nusantara' thingy...we shall believe...His powers are the Most Magnificent...

about 8 years back, i lost a friend because of 'santau'... and i have a girlfriend who lost her mother...and now, a friend's sister is recovering from a 'santau'...this has got to do with hasad dengki...astaghfirullahal 'azim...some of the case was a sad one since it involves siblings...

my family had a history too...i know...

apart from 'santau', there's also a hereditary case of 'saka'...i got one friend suffering from this...
oo Allah, have mercy and bless all of us...aminn...
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my home hunting mission - hahahahahahahaha...i used to be sooo excited...now, i've confused myself...i've had 5-6 of secondhand apartments/condos to choose...and the stake involves RM30 - 40K okay...a tough decision....and when i got myself into this, then only i realize the many, many other things - legal things, public authorities, renovation budget, maintenance, etcetera...aiyaaa...and then, the house value itself...is it better for me to invest in new development house?!!i don't know...i just don't know...

what i know is - i need to move out...i need a new meaning...

huu...we can't always get what we want...

liza, be thankful...

2 comments:

HiDa said...

Just buy a new developed apartment straight from the developer ;)

tunbegia said...

kat kl takdok new development house kanns,

btw, u x beli umah lagi ke? ingatkan dah sign SPA already,

anyway, goodluck my dear,

salamm,