...CINTA tidak pernah masuk akal...

best kan, tinggal kat sini, nak balik rumah kite dalam setengah jam je...nak balik **ra* pun senang jugak...

hey, awak berangan lagi!!!

haha...i smiled hearing that honest, friendly remark last Tuesday...

still exhausted from my Vietnam birthday trip, i took a leave last Tuesday...welcoming baby Laila Zafirah binti Mohd Najmi (19/04/2010), i sent SMS to ummi Mai...

and so, Beebee, Shim and me decided to pay a visit to PCMC...not forgetting Abie who's still on MC for flu...i promised to pick her and my Afnan...

i called Yulie asking whether any fellow DGAs were coming only to know that Yulie's on MC too...OK, you're on my list too then...

ergo, on our way to Kota Damansara, Beebee, Shim and me took the route where I can proudly show my home to be - my best birthday gift this year (i'll write about this later)...nice...yes, Beebee...Room 4 is meant to be 'Bilik Beebee & orang2 lain'...huu...

at PCMC, we met Hasfuan, Mukmin and Yati in Mai's ward...I held Laila in my arms and she opened her big eyes...sooo sweet and pretty...we took pictures, chat a little and kissed goodbye...

around 4pm, we set foot at Fullhouse Cafe but were disappointed because there happen to be a function whereby the cafe will be reopened to public at 7pm onwards...

alternatively, we went to Oldtown Kopitiam across the street for afternoon snacks...

Abie and my Afnan parted ways there as papa Adif came to pick them up...we sent Yulie off at KLCC and sent Shim back home...

ohh...Beebee...thank you for your time...

friendship...it's LOVE..
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haa...i've so much to share and it's already past due...this will be extremely long read...I thank you in advance to read until the end...I've promised Beebee to highlight her presence (so, Beebee - please notice yours in pink: tak banyak pun, i made it a general traveloque)...OK, here goes...

the story of my 20+++++++ birthday celebration...i celebrated in style - went for a Vietnam birthday trip with 3 besties: Beebee, Shim and Nadh...

our first day (17/04/2010) started as early as 545am where we took the Skybus from KL Sentral to LCCT...we need to check in by 7am as our AK880 was scheduled at 915am...

after checking in and performing Subuh prayers, we went to have our Nasi Lemak breakfast at the Taste of Asia...

we reached Tan Son Nhat Airport 20 minutes ahead of schedule...yeay...so, it was around 10am(Vietnam time)...

after immigration clearance, we were greeted by Taylor (AirAsia Go! representative) holding a 'Welcome' sign with Nadh's name...Nadh was thrilled...ahaks...

since it was still early, on our way to the hotel, our driver made a stop at the local fine arts factory - Minh Phuong...

here, we were guided and briefed about the process involved in making lacquer handicrafts..basically, there are 3 types of lacquer finishings: pearl coated, eggshells coated and hand paintings...the final products will undergo several polishing and layering processes...these took about 3 months minimum...whoaa...and the results - very, very fine arts...very, very pricey...we went to the souvenir gallery and only afford to buy a USD$3 stone paper weight...Beebee gave me one - a pre-birthday gift...with a hand-painted pair of goldfishes for ' Good Luck'...

Nadh: Goldfish and pelican, which is luckier?

May (the staff): No,all the same...

Nadh: No, no,no...I want to buy the luckiest...

we ended up with all getting the goldfishes stones...(but, Nadh has the biggest,gumuk stone)

at 12pm, we arrived at Hoang Hai Long Hotel...but, we can only check in at 2pm...and so, we left our luggage and decided to go for lunch...

we took a cab to Sheraton Hotel so that we can change our MYR to VND at the recommended money changer just opposite the said...

not so far from Sheraton is the Jamia Mosque (i guess the only mosque in Ho Chi Minh City)...we went to have our lunch at the hidden backyard of the mosque...here, we were served with plain white rice, mutton curry, pomfret fish curry, diced potatoes and long beans, pappadoms and green skin bananas...we had iced green teas as drinks...

the menu is the same everyday but you were attended with 'kasih sayang'...they heated up every single dish you requested...ask for a fried egg, and they will fry instantly for you...more sambal, more kuah...ohh...coming right up...5 stars++ service for a stall category...loving it...

after prayers, we went for our first photoshoot...we were gedixing under the scorching sun...Ho Chi Minh City is sooo hot OK...and no wind at all...around 32 degrees Celcius...fortunately, this was replaced with lovely us in pictures with the Opera...a Thai i suppose (the guy who help taking pictures) greeted 'Assalamualaikum' as if to mean 'Hello'..by the way, 'Hello' in Vietnam is 'Jao' and thank you is 'Ka Men'...and when people said 'Ka Men', you reply with 'Kom Go Yey' which means 'no problem'....

we settled in our rooms around 2pm and we had our first trouble...Shim was trapped in the bathroom...aduhh...the doorknob was stucked...we called and waited for the room service guy to rescue her...poor Shim and us...

next, we met our Vietnamese boyfriends: Huy and Truong at the hotel lobby...haa...boyfriends for 3 days...thank you Nadh...

Huy: Actually,ladies...when you inform that you were coming, even we Google as to where to bring you around...haha...

our boyfriends then took us to the War Remnants Museum...here, we studied the background of the Vietnam War, the cruelness of US Army that time, the impacts of chemical weapons...soooo terrible...seriously, a living hell...

we also went into the replication of Vietnam prison cells...horror and scary...a very unimaginable torture experience...

and finally, we went admiring the real airplanes and tanks used during the war, which were displayed outside the museum building...

this museum tour makes me wonder...in Malaysia, we also have our own Muzium Negara...huu...I should pay attention more...our own 'Bukit Kepong' tragedy was a sad one...a good read...i cried...

we also have a cruel Pudu Jail and the same real airplanes and tanks...a trip to our Muzium Negara, anyone?!!haa....

next, we went to the Reunification Hall a.k.a. Independence Palace...it is actually the residence of Vietnam's Prime Minister...the palace showcases to the public all the important meeting rooms where the Prime Minister entertain guests coming in either from the Eastern/Western sides...they have different settings for different customs...

we also went around looking at the kitchen, library, dining hall,etcetera...there's also a cinema...and in the event of an emergency, there's a helideck on top of the palace...

we went underground of the palace to discover the chambers of military strategy communication base...they have a powerful radio/satellite station, planning room (with district maps and batallion strength markers) and hidden tunnels for Prime Minister's escape route (this section is closed for public viewing)...this underground level is believed to sustain any nuclear attacks as it was built with sooo very thick 3-layered solid concrete...even the air ventilation system is an advanced technology, separately controlled from the main building overall system...

urmm...if even Vietnam is powerful, i wonder about White House...and our very own Putrajaya?!!ohh..i haven't touch on local political issues for so long...i do care and i read i-would-say 'aliran suara rakyat' medium (papers, blogs)...but there lies a problem...some writings are not free in my country...i reserved my comments...thank you...

at 630pm, we went to Rong Vang Theatre to watch the renowned Vietnam Water Puppetry Show...it is a story of the Hanoi legend where the king dropped his sword into the river and was grateful for the tortoise who went diving and picked it up for him...we can't understand much as it was performed in Vietnamese...by this time, Beebee and Shim were already exhausted...Shim managed to doze off maybe about 10 minutes along the show...I bought a 'Kong Rowa' (the tortoise) toy for Afif but I lost it (maybe left it in a cab)...poor me...

that night, we went for a Vietnamese cuisine dinner at Halal@Saigon... this is a Malaysian owned restaurant that served local Vietnamese cuisine...

we had the traditional Vietnamese springrolls, Baby Clams Sour Soup, Vietnamese Rice Pancakes, Black Pepper Beef with Fried Tonkin and Special Grilled Snapper Fish...we ordered Fresh Coconuts for drinks...we were charged 'touristy price' here but it was well worth considering the ambience...the food were delightful and tasty...

on our way out, we met Khuzai and friends...they were on holidays too...her group was merrier- about 10 people...

we said good night to boyfriend Huy and went back to our hotel for a spa...we went to the Mimosa Massage Centre...we took the Full Foot & Body Reflexology Massage...I upgraded to the Hot Stone Theraphy combination...ahh...foot massage still tickles me...i laugh and i laugh...so far, i think the best still goes to the Khmer Rouge-style massage i had in Cambodia...

the end of our first day in Vietnam...zZzzzzZzz

on second day (18/04/2010), we had our buffet breakfast at the hotel...I don't eat much but i like the baguette and the lotus paste sticky rice dumplings...you see, due to the French colonisation influence, the Vietnamese really knows how to bake fluffy breads...soooo nice...

our agenda of the day is a half-day tour to the famous Cu Chi (pronounced as Koo Chee) Tunnel...we had a 1 1/2 hours bus journey from Saigon to Cu Chi district...

the 4 of us slept on the bus ride waking up in the middle of a rubber estate...haa..that's when our tour guide was busy collecting the entrance fees...

Cu Chi Tunnel was built mimmicking the system of termites colony, where they had openings of many, many rooms catered for families interconnecting via tunnels...it was simply, a village residing underground during the war...a brilliant engineering...

we also got a chance to see various replication of traditional village traps built with bamboo poles...these were also brilliantly designed...very terrifying...

in the middle of the tour, we get to sample the food during war - which was 'ubi kayu bakar'...they served it with mashed roasted groundnuts,salt and sugar...

the highlight of the tour was the experience of crawling inside the real Cu Chi Tunnel...the Tourism Board of Vietnam only allows the Level 1 (100m deep route) to be accessed by visitors...and this opening has been renovated to become slightly bigger as to accommodate the passage of bigger tourists...we had no problems, we are Asians...but, Beebee and me chose to surrender at the first exit (we only went inside for a 30 m deep route)...we need air...we need air...way to go, Shim and Nadh!!!

after the Cu Chi Tunnel tour, it was lunchtime...our boyfriends went back home...we had our lunch at V.N.Halal...noodle time for Beebee, Shim and me while Nadh had her rice...not sedap...the sign is Beebee and me can't finish our meals...truly, they were not to our liking..a team of Beebee and me will 'sayang' our portion but here, they went to waste...poor us...

Shim and Beebee went back to rest at the hotel leaving energetic Nadh and me...

Nadh and me were supposed to survey the Ben Thanh Market...alas...oopss...accidentally we custom made our Ao Yais...MYR140 per pair promised to finish within 18 hours...huuu...

around 7pm, Huy came introducing another boyfriend: Diamond...Truong send his regards...

that night, I had a wonderful birthday dinner on the Saigon River Cruise...we had a good spot on the upper deck, near the stage where they had a piper and guitarist entertaining the guests (thanks Huy for the early reservation)...

we ordered french fries with chopsticks...and fruit juices...Nadh had her sip of Sapodilla juice (big ciku) recommended by Diamond...I had no birthday cake...instead, I had a treat of Special Mint Chocolate Chips Birthday Ice Cream...

Huy requested for the musicians to play a birthday lullaby to me...yeay...at the same time, the sailor waitress came and placed our mixed fruit platters and layered jellies...and the rest made a video birthday wishes...i was deeply touched and speechless...that was also the time i switched on my Nokia whereby i received birthday calls and SMSes and MMSes...thanks...you know who you are...i feel loved...

after alighting from the cruise, we went for a night photoshoot and also to the night market getting souvenirs...happily zzZzzzZzzzz

again, a buffet breakfast at our hotel... had my usual baguette and butter...

last day (19/04/2010) is a $shopping day...we bargained for textiles mainly English cotton and chiffons...and we went to Hong Anh to buy ready-made dresses...

what I $hop?!!alaaa...I feel guilty...I $hop only for me...I'm sorry...I'm sorry...

DGAs and selected few got something...Ao Yai for darling 'Aina...and i never forgot Mama's...other family members, luckily Kak Intan just return from Vietnam few months back...alhamdulillah, not so bad afterall...

Beebee always calmed me...

Dah cukup dah...Orang faham...Awak yang kene faham sekarang ni OK...

we had our lunch at Jamia Mosque again...and the same menu...with the same excellent service...
two thumbs up...

after prayer, we went bargaining for telekung sold at the Madrasah...they had black cloth telekung...Shim and me only took the ordinary white ones...Beebee and Nadh bought the black ones - Arab laa tuh kununn...

we checked out from the hotel...Shim and Nadh were charged for missing slippers...it was a scam laa...sabar ajelahh!!!

we left our luggage at the bellboy when our boyfriends arrived to treat us for Vietnam coffee - a must!

we went to Ca Moy Cafe...they served Vietnam coffee using a special individual filter made from stainless steelware...to neutralize the strength of the coffee, you need to alternate your sip with green tea serve alongside..nice..really nice...no wonder Kak Intan got addicted..Vietnam coffee is best...I should have done this upon arrival...now, i missed it...Nadh too, right?!!

OK, so after coffee time, we said our farewell to our 3-days boyfriends...hukhuk...sobsob...

haha...maybe they were playing sao qua di with us...deep inside their hearts: ahh...finally balik jugak budak2 gedik ini...lega aku...lega....

we had our dinner in flights...sponsored by Shim yang punya banyak uang...AK885 touched down around 1130pm...Fidah picked us up at KL Sentral...we reached Kg Baru around 2am...

ohh...em yeu Vietnam! this is not sao qua di...I do mean it...hoho...thank you sayang2ku...toy yeu ba'...
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i just received my KL Towerthon Challenge 2010 certificate...yeay...my time record is 40:32 minutes...and my placing is 157th out of 500...congratulations liza...

i should train for my next race: MENGO Green Hunt 2010...for my team, i will be Hunter #2...

but , i tripped and bruised both my knees last Wednesday...aiyaa...

a friend comforted me saying that He loves me...and another friend share the tale of the arrogant Pharaoh...insaf saya...

oo Allah, have mercy and protect all of us...

currently read: LIFE! Malaysian style...
currently listening to: Karena Ku Cinta Kau by Bunga Citra Lestari

no more MUA but HOPE never dies...I dare to dream...lovely angels know but He knows all...wallahu'allam...

...dua puluhan...

...a dedication (in remembrance of a dear friend's late father)...

Jika terdengar suara azan

Bergema sayu menjelang pagi

Dalam irama ku kirim pesan

Sebagai tanda aku dah pergi

Jangan ditanya sebab kerena

Mengapa aku pergi menghindar

Dari kau dekat tapi merana

Elok ku jauh tinggal mendengar

Biarlah aku pergi dahulu

Tidak tertahan lagi derita

Semoga yang tinggal senyum selalu

Yang pergi hilang lenyap berita

Bila kelak daku terkenang

Ku tatap bintang di malam kelam

Bila tak sanggup daku berenang

Ku relakan diri hanyut tenggelam

And We enjoined upon man goodness towards his parents: his mother bore him by bearing strain upon strain, and his weaning takes two years. Hence, be thankful to Me and to your parents. With Me is the end of all journeys. Yet, should they endeavour to force you to make gods beside Allah, of whom you have no knowledge then do not obey them. But, even then keep them company in this world's life with customary good behaviour, but follow the faith of those who turn towards Me.

[Luqman 31: 14-15.]

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Iman: nanti (read: this Sunday) kan, Cik Ja berape taun?!!

me: dua puluhan...(giggling)

Iman: tipu...Pak Su pun dua puluhan...Cik Ja mesti lain...

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huhuhu...my coming of age...alhamdulillah, being blessed by Him...insyaAllah...

hidup haruslah berkat...

extracted from another favourite song of mine:

Tuhanku, jangan ambil nyawaku sebelum ku dekat denganMu~~~

Tuhanku, siapkan duniaku 'tuk nanti tiba akhiratku~~~

wuu....happy 20++ besday to me...yeay...

will be celebrating it in Ho Chi Minh City...

a birthday trip with my 3 besties- Beebee, Nadh and Shim...

To: Aliza with love!!

last night, i went to a fantastic 'Kau di Hatiku' concert hosted by Kak Adibah Noor...a charity event aimed to raise fund for TV3 'Bersamamu' programme and to help underprivileged artistes who suffers chronic illnesses...

Kak Adibah welcomed the audiences with 2 new songs from her second album...indeed, she's a powerful songstress...amazing performance...hooo...i can't sing her songs....kukukukuku....

next, we were introduced to the Malaysian Shufflers Group - six young, talented boys doing 'shuffles' dance movement...they were quite nervous on stage...hahaha...who aren't with nearly 400++ spectators?!! and they also should perasan their cuteness...heee...2nd boy from the right...

the show goes on with the line up of new artistes featuring Fazo, Wiwie Daunah and Adzrin...i don't recognize any of them...poor me...

then, we had Nurul performing...such a lovely lady...Amir and me sang 'Eternal Flame' together and she captured us...yeay...she came towards us and we shook hands...lalalalalala...she went back on stage and finished off with her new song ' Sepenuh Jiwa'...

after Nurul, Kak Adibah called upon Sabhi Saddi...he sang the OST for Tari Tirana...ohh...he's handsome (my girldfriends say)...we shout out for him and he did waved back to us...hooo... 'Gemerlapan' - his second song was a catchy song where he did some tapping movements which make girls drooled (heh...not me)...orang Sabah,baa...

Ayu OIAM came on stage...ohh...i like...this petite girl really has 'it'...we enjoyed her undoubted strong vocals...and we gossipped...thanks to Shim...tett...

after that, it was rocking time...we had doses of Dead Mushroom...Shidi was awesome...i never care of the songs - lead guitarist always excites me (solo intermission moment)...

Kak Adibah then invited her old friend - Nizam...He sang i-don't-know a Mexican song, something from a telenovela..maybe a Venezuelan song...huu...next, they put on a duet performance...Kak Adibah and Nizam were singing lagu 'ngorat-ngorat' (ahaks) - an old English song...

Betty Banafe was next with arabic theme...a gedik 'gelek-gelek' song...she's a real charmer...i turned my face...poor me...

a tall,sweet Nita came into the limelight...she's not that skinny but is still underweight...she sang a new song (i don't know the title) and a Sheila Majid's song - Ku Mohon...Shim and me sang together...

later, it was my favourite kakak's turn - Kak Amy Mastura...i used to send her Raya cards...some 15 years ago...hahahaha...Kak Amy entertained us with 'Happy' and 'Fiesta'...and she brought along a group of percussion ensemble playing all sorts of drums...a madness...woohoo...there was interactive session too where we clapped to the rhythms set by the conductor...yeay...

after Kak Amy, it was Atilia's turn...i didn't pay much attention...poor me again...we went to the restroom...but, i did noticed that she had the best dress of the night...a dazzling blue piece...nice...

Aizat time was the best of all...yeay...moments i've been waiting...

ku petik gitar akustik ini (uuuu...live band OK)

nice...nice...

dengan harapan dia mendengar~~~

Lagu Untukmu...heeee.....then, it was 'Pergi'...

Kau pergi~~aaa sukenye

finally, Zainal Abidin with 'Hijau' and a new song...he joked with the audiences...a veteran -he knows how to pull the crowd (almost midnight OK)...

then, all the performers were called on stage where suddenly we had a surprise performance by Kak Zaiton Sameon...she overcame her fear and sang her famous ' Menaruh Harapan' song...huuu...it was full of emotion...we gave her standing ovation...

the concert closes with nyanyian beramai-ramai (the entertainers + us)...yess...it was 'Kau di Hatiku'...i love this song...i love this song...Tarzan...Tarzan...

we lingered for a while - taking pictures...

Aizat autographed my KauAku Tshirt...

To: Aliza with love!!

a meaningful tag - ...Mengejar Mimpi...Biar Sampai Akhirnya Nanti

who's Kau?! hahahahaha...Allah knows...

p/s: thanks lovely girldfriends + a boyfriend (Yulie, Kak Ayu, Pipah, Anna, Shim, Mek Ya and Amir)...love you to bits...

...aku cinta Allah...

andaikan diriku bisa seperti yang lain

yang Kau sayang

yang Kau rindukan

yang Kau cintai

aku lemah tanpaMu

aku lelah

aku sungguh tak berdaya

tolongku

tolongku Ya Allah

setiap air mataku mengalir

Allah, aku lemah dan tak berarti

setiap derai tangis membasahi

Allah, jangan tinggalkan aku lagi

aku sayang Allah

aku rindu Allah

aku cinta Allah

aku lemah tanpaMu

aku lelah

aku sungguh tak berdaya

tolongku

tolongku Ya Allah

i found this song while tending to my fragileness nearly 1.5 months ago...my soul was 'kosong'...i was soooo down...

it was so happen that my lovely girlfriends were none at the side...i cried a lot...i was demotivated...

how can i not fall for an angel sent by Him? a friend rephrase to me that we're the one who keeps forgetting Him, He never leaves any of us....sooooo true...

i trust that friend to talk about many, many life and after life queries...each time, i will feel calm...i found peace...thank you...

we're conscious now...i am relieved it is still fine and great...alhamdulillah...

recently we chatted on likeness...i try to deny something that i dislike...

and i keep reminding myself that something that i dislike maybe is likable by others - so, there must be something nice of everything regardless...

and there's also karma...if you dislike something/someone, it will reflect back to you that something/someone may not like you too in return...this part scares me...

according to my friend, it was normal as human being to not like certain people...people who annoys us at times...

asalkan jangan burukkan die...jangan fitnah2 orang...ngadu je aa ngan Allah...

ok...i will keep that to myself...between me and the people i don't like (not many...insyaAllah)...

i always perasan baik...maybe this menjengkelkan some people towards me...i choose to 'diam'...(again, perasan baiklah itu)

and we can't satisfy everyone...let them be...

and some can't satisfy me too...go ahead with your favourism...i won't judge you...my Ultimate Lover- Allah will...He knows...
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yesterday, Intan came to KL...we attended Ainan Safiyya's cukur jambul ceremony in Bandar Baru Salak Tinggi...happy to meet Puan Aini and Encik Azmi...we talked about 'bunian'...hehehe...apparently, Ainan has been disampuk/disergah by this 'city of unseen creatures'...it used to be a small community but now has become a powerful 'kerajaan'...the family had to call a scholar from Indonesia in aid of curing the situation...

i've heard of other stories too regarding this 'Misteri Nusantara' thingy...we shall believe...His powers are the Most Magnificent...

about 8 years back, i lost a friend because of 'santau'... and i have a girlfriend who lost her mother...and now, a friend's sister is recovering from a 'santau'...this has got to do with hasad dengki...astaghfirullahal 'azim...some of the case was a sad one since it involves siblings...

my family had a history too...i know...

apart from 'santau', there's also a hereditary case of 'saka'...i got one friend suffering from this...
oo Allah, have mercy and bless all of us...aminn...
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my home hunting mission - hahahahahahahaha...i used to be sooo excited...now, i've confused myself...i've had 5-6 of secondhand apartments/condos to choose...and the stake involves RM30 - 40K okay...a tough decision....and when i got myself into this, then only i realize the many, many other things - legal things, public authorities, renovation budget, maintenance, etcetera...aiyaaa...and then, the house value itself...is it better for me to invest in new development house?!!i don't know...i just don't know...

what i know is - i need to move out...i need a new meaning...

huu...we can't always get what we want...

liza, be thankful...

...pause...

i am so sorry...

i am being selfish...

i want to tell...

i want a listener...

i try not to weigh down on people...

i am not important...

saya sedar diri...insyaAllah...

but, when i sensed coldness, i choose to pause for a while...

i LOVE silent me now...when nobody listens except Him...thank you Allah...

p/s: life is cruel...at times...and it is temporary anyway...saya tidaklah kuat...kekuatanku dariMu...

...enough...

i should not stay (where i don't belong)

...i still believe...

it was yesterday, i talked crap...again...
ohh, why can't i get this over with?!!

i laughed it off during lunch...

and everytime, with different people, i will get different perspectives...

yet, stubborn me never listens..

i ended up following - whatever makes me happy~~~lalalalalala...

obviously, my brain and my heart are not aligned...need to have a reality check every now and then...

i keep changing my mind...but, i act nonchalantly...

i am complex...Allah understands me...and He, the Only One who knows...
ifs are of no concern...since He wills everything..

i still believe...that's what matters...

my problem should not be a problem...i created them to pass time...huuuuu...
that's how i gotten myself into unnecessary misery...

i like a saying from a friend:
kalu ikutkan, semua orang ade problem...tapi, janganlah menyusahkan orang...

luckily, i think most of my problems only trouble me...dear friends will keep on listening - thank you :) but, at the end of the day, i need to rescue myself...this is my beautiful life...

i listens well too...and so, i realized how ungrateful and selfish i am all this while...i fail to see the great many things i possess...

it is true then - Allah is the Most Fair...

nobody's perfect - in certain aspects, you might be OK...accordingly, there will be lackings in other aspects too...

living life is indeed a test...He'll examine in the Hereafter...subhanallah...

lately, i keep on reminding myself of death - this will ensure we behave humbly...insyaAllah...
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i got my second fitness medal for the year 2010...yeay...Energizer Night Race 2010 - 10km Finisher Medal...woohoo...i even beat my own personal record by finishing in approximately 75 minutes...congratulations liza and friends...

the next day (Sunday), i treated myself...went to AsterSpring AU2...then, a great lunch at Leo's - had Grilled Assam Fish with Steamed Rice + Iced Lemon Tea + 2 slices of Watermelon...and i bought myself 2 new books (jumlah terkumpul buku 'akan dibaca' = 14 buah) and a new flowery Arcadia dress (for my upcoming Vietnam trip)...

in the evening, Afif and me went to Lake Titiwangsa so that 'Aina and Iman can do some revision for their tests...that night, a lovely dinner - Kak Intan made Olio Spaghetti...nice...2-3 little shrimps won't harm me...hehe...

ohh...i love my happening weekend...
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on Monday evening, i had a movie outing with Mas...we watched 'Evolusi KL Drift 2'...a good effort...OK laa...i would gladly rate it at 3.72 stars...it's cruel to compare with Initial D...

the plot is simple...drift actions are OK...the thrill is there...

most people watch but they don't get to see...i saw Abang Muz - hahahahahaha...i like this naive character - sensible yet expressionless...my type of intelligent guy...hehe...

28/03/2010 - 2 years has gone by and i still miss Jack...like i've promised before - the story of Jack 'mati hidup semula'...

recently, about 2 months back - Jeleen's friend had an accident...while sending BGP to a workshop in Lumut, the workshop owner happens to be using Jack...exactly the same plate number (can't reveal here)...only the new reform Jack is white...

Jack's keychain is still with me...

Jack - my 1st sports car...and Jack was my saviour too...my door was the only exit...you see, the chassis had been ruined...

i can't understand why there are people allowing Jack to be reformed as 'kereta potong'...all the best in answering Him later...macam-macam hal...wallahu'allam...

...friendship benchmark...

bee, ade orang ajak kite kawan biase...tapi, kite kawan x biase ngan die...

ooo...bis tu awak kawan biase macam mane?!

hurmm...

awak tau ke die kawan biase macam mane? maybe 'benchmark' die x same ngan awak...

haah...itu kite x tau lah...

and then, i was silent for a long, long time...thinking...

i have never come across this interesting thought...now that it has popped up, it makes me realized that i don't have kawan biase because i can't properly defined (as in benchmarking) the term 'biase'...

i guess i treat each of my friends differently in my own special way...all of you are special and dear to me OK...

indeed i am truly grateful i have special people around me...yeay...alhamdulillah...

oh yaa...to all my special friends - i don't mind to be your kawan biase or kawan tak biase as long as (i hope) whenever you hear my name anywhere, anytime; somehow i cross your mind and you will smile and say,"hey, she's my friend!"

and don't expect biase to come from me yaa...yes...i can be your kawan biase (applicable to all) but none of you are my kawan biase...remember, remember - all of you are my kawan-kawan tak biase...

please do what friends do best - be a good friend...a good friend accepts a good friend the way he/she is...

aliza ialah begini...

aliza sayang kawan-kawan tak biase aliza semuanya :)

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happy earth day...and happy earth hour too...wish me luck for tonight's Energizer Night Race 2010...woohoo...i'm going to get my 2nd medal...insyaAllah...

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cheer up...too soonlah, liza...sayang ni...

yaa...i know...

i was in your situation once...i know how you're suffering...and now, it is a painful period...for you and for me too...not to worry, we'll work it out OK...

yes...i have plans...just wait and see...and Allah knows the best...

i want to move and i will...

alaaa...kite x pandai cakap...

sape kate? aliza...sekenal kite, kite rase awaklah pandai bercakap than most people...problemnye awak tak bukak mulut je...

my problem: i keep my mouth shut

reason: the truth always hurt...and i speak the truth...

oo Allah...guide me to Your best path...aminnn...

...hidup bersandar harapan...

hope - is the feeling we have that the feeling we have is not permanent.

-my all time favourite song-

mungkin hanya Tuhan

yang tahu segalanya

apa yang ku inginkan

di saat-saat ini

kau tak 'kan percaya

kau selalu di hati

haruskah ku menangis

untuk mengatakan yang sesungguhnya

kaulah segalanya bagi ku

kaulah curahan hati ini

tak mungkin ku melupakan mu

tiada lagi yang ku harap

hanya kau seorang

kau tak 'kan percaya

kau selalu di hati

haruskah ku menangis

untuk mengatakan yang sesungguhnya

kaulah segalanya bagi ku

kaulah curahan hati ini

tak mungkin ku melupakan mu

tiada lagi yang ku harap

hanya kau seorang

kaulah segalanya untuk ku

kaulah curahan hati ini

tak mungkin ku melupakan mu

tiada lagi yang ku harap

hanya kau seorang

tiada lagi yang ku harap

hanya kau seorang

...my honesty breaks mama's heart...

mama, i'm sorry...i'm so so sorry...please forgive me...

in order to keeping up pleasing other people's hearts, i forgot the most important heart of all - my mama's...an angel friend reminded me...

yesterday morning, i called mama asking things around the house, mama and abah's life and how's everybody...OK, so mama had a back pain since Sunday...Jeleen will be heading back to Lumut...Jemi ada di rumah...Baby Adik is busy with his campus life...

everything seems normal to me until just right before we hung up...

Ja...Bo lah jujur sangak...Sudoh-sudoh lah...

Hoo... (berdengung sket)

our phone conversation ended there...

and tears welled up my eyes...

then, another angel friend appeared before me...she made me realized the truth that i'm living in denial...i'm partly not OK...

and really, mothers know their children...thank you, mama...

the bright side, things will never be the same again...

mama, i will give time time...you don't need to worry...insyaAllah...He'll protect me...He loves all of us...

it's not even a break up...it's just there...no explanation...more of an imaginary 'thingy'...

so, i got another advice from another friend: don't live in fantasy anymore...

i will my friend...yeay...

oklaa...never thought i'm very open in expressing my feelings...i guess i'm like so many others out there...the only different - iye...saya jujur sangat...dan saya suarakan di sini dengan bebas...

again,mama, please don't worry...it's just the way i'm keeping myself sane...i'm interacting with the world...and i'm loving it...

lately i'm receiving more than i give...

kite patut bsyukur kan...

patut~~~baguslah sekarang dah balik kat awak...

tapinye, sume2 nk sayang kite sekarang...kite x biase...(ini tande x bsyukur - astaghfirullah)

kite takut kite lupe nk return balik...

huhuhu...

tau je orang sayang tp org x tunjuk...

all in all, i conclude that it's our duties to spread Allah's love...

___________________________________________

last Sunday, i went running and climbing all the way up KL Tower...woohooo...2058 steps, all right...hehehe...i'm proud of myself...

i got my first medal for the year 2010: KL International Towerthon Challenge 2010 Finisher Medal...yeay...yeay...not really sure how do i fare with other participants...but, they will print the time record on my certificate...on the running day, we had this ChampionChip attached to our shoelace...i guess i made it less than 30 minutes for the staircases but running from the foothill to the tower really tested my endurance...pancit lah...

climbing up the staircases will really tested your mental strength...i overheard a crew answering to a runner along the way: 5 more to go...and so, i climb and i climb and i climb...

and guess what?!! it's not 5 flight of stairs more - it's actually 5 more water/medical stations to go...ohh...what the well!!!aiyarkk...

finally, i conquered KL Tower...by climbing stairs equivalent to 28th floors building...i am really proud of myself...subhanallah...

the next best thing was a picnic at Sg Pisang...i met many new friends...the waterfall is majestic and cool and just amazing...only we were there...soo nice and crystal clear...and i even had fish spa...ade lagi tempat bersih macam ni...cantikk...

sungguh saya adalah happy :)

...saya tidak marah...

honestly, i'm not angry...towards anyone...

i won't let that negativity dominates me...it's unhealthy...

now, i'm the one who feels guilty...for making certain individual 'susah hati'...

i am sorry...i didn't mean to...

sahlah anda tidak kenal saya...

ade org ckp awak mara...kite pun jwblaa  - tak, aliza x mara...die nk tau je...

awak rase kite tulis cam marah ke?!!

tak pun...kite bace dengan lembut...

hehehehehe...ermmm...

dear friends, have you ever read any 'Cinderella' stories or watched any 'Cinderella' movies?!! any version will do, trust me OK...hargailah 'Cinderella' dlm kisah-kisah itu...

begitu jugaklaa 'malay cinderella'...lebih kuranglah...

selembut-lembut hati - takkan marah orang punyalah :)

semoga sentiasalah aku di bawah lindungan rahmatNya...aminn...

you can feel me if you read with soft tone (like what F did)...thank you!

__________________________________________________

i just came back from PMU Annual Gathering 2010...had fun with fellow DGAs...gedik photos surely be updated in FB...Wir and Apisku were among the lucky friends...food were yummy yummylicious...but, we were lack of mineral water...and no MILO van...i was - TIRED...haaaa...can't think much...

not much time to write as i've promised to pick Farrah after Asar...and i need to go visit MAPEX 2010...will meet up with Zarith if time permits...

hey, i love me...will need to have a good good rest before i tortured myself again...early tomorrow morning...2000++ steps to go...regretting now...hahahaha...

liza will have fun tomorrow...limau, silelah jeles!!

ohh...iye...terlupe pulak...bercakap pasal marah ni, last thursday night, a Negro scolded me...

that Negro guy just came back from his workout...at that time, i was reversing Ryan to park at the curbside of Villa Wangsamas 2 ( i went to Kak Ayu's house)...i can't remember much the words he used in cursing me...i chose to ignore most of them...

he approached me from the left, but i did caught the phrase:

can't you see?!!

in my heart (dear sir, you came from the left OK...maybe you were inside my blind spots...so, that explains why i can't see you...and obviously, you are black...sorry...)

i remained inside Ryan and let him walked past us (still swearing ugly words)...later, Yulie came pick me up...

and i asked Yulie's opinion on whether i should put up a sticker indicating my eye problem...

what it should say: hello...my left eye is 80% blind...beware!!!

nanti orang ingat kau main-main plak...

dah tu, takmo aku pasang tanda OKU...sebab bukan...

this was left unanswered...any suggestions?!!

...post revelation days...

ermm...i've been experiencing a roller coaster emotional stability...

averaging all, i want to stay happy and healthy and pretty...

my writing freedom has been restricted...do i care?!! yess...i feel gloomy...

it's decided i'll just be me...thank you...

yesterday, a friend - W announcing to my section in the office (there were 8 people altogether within the hearing distance) a sarcastic remark:

cinderella hepi ker?!!

W grinned and chuckled...

sape cinderella?!! - my other friend Z snapped at W...

ehh, tak, aku caring hal kawan2 - W replied unguiltily...

oo..ya Allah...unable to express my anger does not mean that i'm not...for me, marah itu bukanlah sifat manusia...itu sifat Yang Maha Esa...

to W, you have your rights to read...yes...i made it public...but, please don't violate my rights...please don't put up a show...thanks for being caring...i appreciate that but you're not the only one...you may give comments here...or send e-mails to me, please...use the technology, OK...we're modern people...

blogging is not new to me...i've been writing (or, should i rephrase as typing) for the past 7 years++...my fellow readers had never interrupted my storyline...they seek me personally for extra clarification...

this bring me to another friend - G who upsets me recently...i'm not really sure who is G...hence, let's just assume G as an anonymous guy who happens to be a friend of S and also a friend of me...

the fact: G was the one who told S about 'malay cinderella'...

i don't know what was G's intention in doing so...i hope it was a good one...tell me, please...

to G, you have your rights to read too...yes, you're welcome...but, i think it's my rights for you to have several words with me first...you should have came and really confirmed your guess of S directly with me...i admitted it was my mistake in making it soooo obvious...but, still, we might discuss things...

i've never mentioned directly i'm falling for S...you, G and other readers might be interpretting differently...that will be your thoughts...i respected that...

in my previous posts, i did share how scared i am to open up...so, i'm still in the developing phase myself...i start building my foundation slowly...do you get my point here? i want to discover it by myself - be it in a simple or hard way...i shared my journey here but i don't expect my piling came tumbling down just like that...this is what i called a sabotage...again, i don't know what is your good intention - meddling into my world...

when, you know, all this while, my friends have been following my stories too...they came and asked figuring who is S...i answered when i want to...

even the closest friend of S and me - F do not cross the line...F let me be me...

because of what?!!
because nobody really knows how does the relationship really is between S and me...nobody can tell...i'm just happy i care...this is not a surprise...i care for many others too...

reevaluating myself, i'm accepting my fate...Allah wills it to happen...alhamdulillah..

we're good friends...i will always be...i do want to care..as usual...just let me be...

p/s: my mama read my blog too...i love you, mama :)

enough on this, other happenings:

1. my blergghhhh job - currently i'm charting 4 options to be discussed with my unhelpful boss...all the best dear boss in answering Him later...once i'm ready, will share it here...
2. my home hunting - i will decide by end of this month...will be viewing 3 more apartments...and planning to visit MAPEX this weekend...
3. my fitness - Towerthon Challenge this Sunday...yeay...

currently still reading 'Lasykar Pelangi' - stucked at page 54...hurmm...Pesta Buku Antarabangsa starts today...oh noo....oh noo....gilalah saya...hehe...tapi kan...in my new home - insyaAllah i will have a library...yeay...yeay...