i got my second opinion last Thursday…a shocking one…yes…but I took it bravely enough…I’m now officially sight-disabled person…my new ophthalmologist confirmed me of having primary open angle glaucoma (POAG) with unidentifiable cause…most likely, it stems out resulting from my past tragedies with Jack…
my left eye now is nearly quarter blind with 23.4% blind spots/damaged optic nerves at the top left section of my left eyeballs…I also had high reading of ocular stress and suffers dry eye syndrome…
however, I feel very lucky and grateful for:
1. I’m still able to see my beautiful world around me, my lovely family and friends’ joy faces…
2. I’m still able to fool around with my handsome Ryan…
3. I’m just blessed…
I got difficulties in focusing on words (on screens and on hardcopy items)…my job needs my eyes…that’s one problem…my passion needs my eyes…that’s two problems…I can’t part with my books and my Rose…
So,what’s there for me? i’ve been prescribed with new specifications for a new pair of glasses…my right eye can still receives 100% light whereas its damaged partner has limited access of almost 90% only… my new frame was chosen by ‘Aina and Beebee…it was a bright, white full-rimmed metal frame by Guess…I got myself a custom-made transition lenses from Japan…it will arrive some time within this week…
And lucky me…alhamdulillah…today, I went for my follow-up session…the 1st line theraphy was working alright…three kinds of eye drops to reduce my eyes’ stress level…my right eye has toned down to reach the stress reading at 17 and my left eye fortunately return to normal stress level of 16…yeay…need to continue for another month…best advice is to stay happy…
Looking back at the past few days, indeed I felt happy happy for:
1. having lovely girlfriends to gossip & sharing & caring last Friday at MFM…we even venture to our ‘favourite store’…*wink wink* to Mai…
2. spending time with no14 for a movie outing...we watched 'Talentime'...nice...at 4.76 stars...
3. visiting almost 2-months old Shahzad Raza (handsome prince) with Beebee and Suzie
4. supporting Earth Hour 2009…was having nice dinner at Suraya Seafood in Kampung Baru…(again with Beebee and Suzie and little Ms Aini)
5. enjoying myself during PRD BBQ family day at Nur Lembah Pangsun…
6. receiving surprises and more surprises from I, II and III (no comment on this…go figure...hehe)
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
...make me happy so I (eye) can see...
Sunday, March 29, 2009
...tagtime...
not in the mood to write...so, i opt to answer tags from friends...
this is from Kak Farah...
Finish the sentence...
1. My ex...who?!!
2. Maybe I should... finish up reading ‘Shantaram’ so that I can move on to my long list of unread books...
3. I love...ME!
4. People would say that I'm...comel a.k.a. cute (meaning – ugly but nice to see)...
5. I don't understand...men’s jokes...(i’m blur and soooo tulus)
6. When I wake up in the morning...i check on the time...
7. I lost...a set of 3 gold rings given by Mama...
8. Life is full of...ups and downs which in turn makes me wiser....
9. My past...were unregrettable...i cherished them all...
10. I get annoyed when...there exists judgmental and narrow-minded people...
11. Parties are...a great chiller to gossip and eat and sharing and eat and caring and eat...
12. I wish...I don’t have to depend on MYR...
13. Dogs...are fierce and uncute...
14. Cats...are cute and lazy...
15. Tomorrow...is Monday...
16. I have a low tolerance...towards lactose-prone dairy products...
17. If I had a million dollars...I would gladly realised my dream of having my own Kedai Nasi Liza...
18. I'm totally terrified...of scary movies and being followed...I avoid dark places...it feels creepy...
19. My spouse...i wonder who?!!
20. My life...is blessed...alhamdulillah...
and this one is from Zarith...
This is called 50 FIRST REACTIONS... type what comes to your mind FIRST whenever you hear these 50 words. Don't think and don't go back and change. Doesn't matter how random just type it! Repost it for all of your (bored) friends.
1. Beer: Non-Halal
2. Food: Diet
3. Relationships: Open
4. Crush: MB, Abah, Putera
5. Power Rangers: Go go Power Rangers
6. Life: Beautiful
7. The President: Obama
8. Yummy: Sumi
9. Car: Ryan
10. Movie: Titanic
11. Halloween: Pumpkin
12. Sex: Female
13. Religion: Islam
14. Hate: Liars
15. Fear: Snakes
16. Marriage: 01/01/201?
17. Blondes: Paris Hilton
18. Slippers: Pink SPAKO Comfort
19. Shoes: Nike
20. Asians: Brown
21. Pass time: Colouring
22. One night stand: Sinful
23. My cell Phone: Nokia 6500 Slide
24. Smoke: No
25. Fantasy: Cinderella
26. College: RMC
27. High school Life: SSPKL
28. Pajamas: Satin
29. Stars: Aries
30. Center: no5
31. Alcohol: Wine
32. The word LOVE: Sayang
33. Friends: Retentate, Sohabat9600, PIPEII, Chemy, UTPJan01, DGAs
34. Money: CIMB
35. Heartache: Deep
36. Time: waits for no man
37. Divorce: Makruh
38. Dogs: Fierce
39. Undies: Cotton
40. Parents: Loving
41. Babies: Cute
42. Ex: Who?
43. Song: Kerna Ku Sayang Kamu
44. Color: Purple
45. Weddings: 01/01/201?
46. Pizza: Hawaiian Chicken
47. Hangout: Friends
48. Rest: Iee-bear
49. Goal: MU
50. Inspiration: My Way
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
...fully alive & kicking...
the past few days were awesome in spite of having minor eye sore...my eyeballs experienced some kind of internal stress...i got blurry vision for 4 consecutive days until i went to see an opthalmologist...apparently, the result was not enticing...i was given a small acidic eye drops to reduce the stress level...my follow up appointment will be this coming Saturday...however, concerned besties had encouraged me to get a second opinion...okay, so i had an appointment with TTMC's opthalmologist tomorrow...lalalalalala...end of health update...
later that evening, Yati and me went to Venice Hill attending Yus's simple gathering...there were nearly 20 of us..we celebrated her upcoming birthday together with Fadz's birthday (that day) plus Siti's belated birthday...and i had another round of karaoke session...the difference was that Yus's preset songs in her karaoke set were mostly oldies songs...the interesting part was the fact that it came with score and remarks at the end of every song sang...hahaha...'Not Bad' range in between 75 to 89...90 and above will give you 'Good Job'...less than 20 and you'll get sarcastic 'Try Singing?'...hahahaha...thanks Yus for inviting...really had so much fun...great food and all...
Sunday, March 22, 2009
...A for ?!!...(was tagged by dear Chuna)
Rules:Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real...nothing made up! If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question.
1. What is your name : Aliza
2. A four Letter Word : Acid
3. A boy's Name : Aidhan
4. A girl's Name : Amanda
5. An occupation : Astronaut
6. A color : Amber
7. Something you'll wear : Adidas jersey
9. A food : Aglio Olio E Peperoncinno Pasta
10. Something found in the bathroom: Armitage Shanks sink
11. A place : Ampang Point
12. A reason for being late : Accident on the road
13. Something you'd shout : Aargghhh!
14. A movie title : Armageddon
15. Something you drink : Arabica beans ice blended mocha
16. A musical group : Aerosmith
17. An animal : Arowana
18. A street name : Alamanda Street
19. A type of car : Audi RX8
20. The title of a song : Atas Nama Cinta
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
...small hero.big heart...
Monday, March 16, 2009
...island red...
it seems that i've aplenty of things running about recently...not much time to keep updating my blog - i'll just give brief notes then...
Friday, March 13, 2009
...tears + laughters = speechless me...
today, i happily went on my usual long friday lunch date...
i spent my lunch time in tears and laughters...lalalalala...was swarming with continuous ramblings, comments and queries by all my concern experienced girldfriends...
and there goes the drama cheery expressions of O (ohh) M (am) G (gee)...they even had hand gestures to go with that...hahaha...
as for me - no comment yaa...will share in due time...i definitely need more time...seriously in fear of getting hurt...i'm fragile at heart okay...
you girls really ROCKS!
i love you girls dearly
*wink wink*
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
...starlight...
Paling jauh..
Ku cuba untuk mengutipmu
Semalam aku terjatuh..
Kau sambut walau berdegup
Sejuknya malam itu
Musim bunga atau salju
Bertemu..
Oh Bintang..
Paling jauh..
Ku cuba untuk mengutipmu
Semalam aku terjatuh..
Kau dakap walaupun halus
Sejuknya di malam itu
Musim bunga atau salju
Bertemu…
Gugurlah bintang
langit terang
di taman sepi mimpiku
Gugurlah bintang
langit terang
di taman sepi mimpiku
Oh Bintang..
Paling jauh..
Ku cuba untuk mengutipmu
Semalam aku terjatuh..
Kau sambut walau berdegup
Sejuknya malam itu
Musim bunga atau salju
Gugurlah bintang
langit terang
di taman sepi mimpiku
Gugurlah bintang
langit terang
di taman sepi mimpiku
Lagu bintang…paling terang….di taman sepi mimpiku
Lagu bintang…paling terang….di taman sepi mimpiku
Sepi mimpiku
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
...a wrecking day for me...
It has been for quite sometime now…I know there’s something not right with me…I’m lost…somewhere in the middle of reality and fantasy…and today proves something when my bestie Abie told me that she sensed the weird me – my ‘other’ side…I agree bie…I can never hide any secrets from you…
And I made a terrible remarks this evening towards N…my ‘other’ side can become very blunt…I just blurted the sentence out without thinking…I know she’s been hurt but I can’t undo the damage…it was a reflex following several external factors encircling my unstable mind as of now…actually, the whole scene was like a flip side of dissatisfied me with things happening to me…the subject should be me…and the victim was N at the time of the incident…I’m so so sorry N…I’m the problem, okay…I am never good at playing around the bush…and I prefer to smile and let people wonder…I always want to be the sweet kid…my mean ‘other’ side came out at the wrong timing…I regret that…I truly am…it was just uncontrollable…
But there’s always a silver lining at the end of a rainbow…Harni makes my day…thank you darling for this:
Monday, March 9, 2009
...wir & suzie's meaningful sunday...
early sunday morning, Mai and me took off on our journey to Kulai...we were told by lovely Yati that it will took us nearly 4 hours maximum to reach Wir's resident from KL...considering this, we even decided to have our breakfast on the way...we followed all the speed limits along the highway remembering Erin's advice...hence, we were the earliest to arrive at around 11.10am...hahaha...Wir hasn't even had her make up on yet...and eventually Mai was the one putting her grey contact lenses in...
since we're not that hungry yet, we witnessed Wir being groomed...not so long after that, her fellow photographers came including Raf and Hasfuan...Mai and me went to have our 'nasi minyak' when Marissa arrived with Nik...we came back to Wir's room to wait for Yati...
when Yati finally arrived, Wir still had to set her hair...so, we went to accompany Yati to have her meal...later, when Wir has already settled - (you look superbly fabulous, my dear), we took a quick snapshots with her...alas, we don't have much time to meet up with the bridegroom, our dear Khairool as their tentative 'bersanding' ceremony will be at 230pm...we had promised to attend Suzie's engagement ceremony that very same day at 3pm...
anyway, to Wir and Khairool, i wish both of you love of a lifetime, many happy returns...insya-Allah...
Yati led the way to Suzie's house by old roads...the journey was wavy across pineapple farms and palm oil estates...you can really see that the roads are wavy just by looking at the road sidelines...they are not flat...so so obvious....hahaha...it was like sailing on land...what an experience...
...me, mai, suzie, yati...
...hana, me, suzie...
Congratulations Suzie & Ai - both of you are sweet...ohh yaa, i like the currypuffs...hehehe...
after we took leave from Suzie's place, Mai & me went to our next stop - Ayer Hitam...our plan was to get miscellanous items for Mai's upcoming wedding in May...Mai ended up buying her bunga manggar and bunga pahar...i dreamed of my own wedding...
we reached KL around 10pm and were totally exhausted...but having Mai to listen and consult on matters really worth it...love you Mai...thanks...
Saturday, March 7, 2009
...the end of the world...
Why does the sea rush to shore?
Don't they know it's the end of the world?
`cause you don't love me anymore...
Why do the birds go on singing?
Why do the stars glow above?
Don't they know it's the end of the world?
It ended when I lost your love...
I wake up in the morning and I wonder
I can't understand,
Why does my heart go on beating?
Why do these eyes of mine cry?
Don't they know it's the end of the world?
It ended when you said good-bye...
ohh dear...ohh dear...i need some excitement...
i longed...and i hoped...sigh~~~
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
...empty...
or should i say, i'm too rich with my feelings...empty to the sense of not being able to share with anyone this-so-called jumbled up emotions...recently, i was enthralled...the excitement continues - i was captivated even in my sleep...i was thrilled over the moon...yet, at the same time, i had a guilt feeling and was embarrassed too...i am happy and excited...but i know, i'm not content...i wanted to hope but i can't let myself shattered later...at the end, i'm still an ordinary human being...i'm just SUPER confused...
p/s: please don't ask, i won't answer anyway...i just want to belong...
Sunday, March 1, 2009
...hepi besday dear afif...
